Jokes Viewer

Chuck Norris NEVER calls the cops. The cops call Chuck Norris.

Jimmy Fallon has to ask Chuck Norris permission "to make it rain up in here".

War of The Worlds was actually a documentary- all the aliens died out after Chuck Norris dealt with them.

Chuck Norris built a time machine and went back in time to stop the JFK assassination. As Oswald shot, Chuck Norris met all three bullets with his beard, deflecting them. JFK's head exploded out of sheer amazement.

When Chuck Norris attended a Boy George concert, Boy George soon found himself in the nose bleed section - literally.

When Chuck Norris was about to undergo a major surgical procedure, he was given a strong anesthetic and told to count backward slowly from one hundred. When Chuck got to zero and still didn't feel even slightly drowsy, he naturally murdered all the doctors with their own tools and performed the procedure himself.

The Most Interesting Man in the World's hair is not actually grey. It's actually covered with Chuck Norris' sperm.

Chuck Norris caught a chicken using a dead alligator as bait.

I would like to take this spot to remember Michael Jackson, who was pronounced dead on the 25th. He was the King of Pop, and we will all miss him. Rest in peace. Suspected cause of death: A Chuck Norris delivered roundhouse kick to the face. Evidence: Missing nose, giant bootprint.

All bad guys ever kicked by Chuck Norris in TV/movies immediatly died upon end of contract. Chuck Norris respects the Law.