Jokes Viewer

The US did not boycot the 1980 Summer Olympics. Chuck Norris was the only US qualifier for every event. He decided not to compete because there was no challenge.

Chuck Norris can bend irony into balloon-animal shapes.

The world is actually a long action movie franchise and we're all just background characters in Chuck Norris' story.

Chuck Norris keeps all the nuclear launch codes pinned to his fridge.

Every once in awhile Chuck Norris goes on vacation to asia or the Middle-East. While there he usually gets into a bar-fight. Afterwards, this is remembered as a "war"

Chuck Norris went for a stroll in the jungle and was ambushed by a very hungry tiger. The attack was brutal, merciless and clinical. The tiger just doesn't have a ghost of chance at all. That is how Chuck Norris got the tiger rug in his living room.

The Chicago Cubs are the worst team in baseball history. The only reason Cub fans still exist is because they are the only group of losers that Chuck Norris, uncharacteristically, has displayed any mercy for.

Chuck Norris can complete the Kama Sutra in a weekend in his log cabin with nothing but a bottle of whiskey, a bag of salt and vinegar potato chips and a small hijacked busload of cheerleaders.

Miley Cyrus was inspired to do Wrecking Ball after actually swinging on one of Chuck Norris's balls.

Chuck Norris' penis is usually equipped with a bayonet.