Jokes Viewer

Following every bowl of horse hair & ballbearing bisque, Chuck Norris drinks a quart of Liquid Plummer to aid in digestion.

Chuck Norris' tongue is actually a proboscis.

Chaoticians are going to rename the so-called 'butterfly effect' as the 'Norris effect'- whenever Chuck Norris goes bezerk and destroys a city, another city on the other side of the world blows up also.

I pledge allegiance to the flag of the United States of America. And to the Republic for which it stands, one nation under Chuck Norris, indivisible with liberty and roundhouse kicks for all.

Fun Fact: The moment Chuck Norris was pulled from his mother's womb all the doctors and nurses in the hospital began to sing "O' Fortuna" in its entirety. There is still no scientific explanation as to how this happened.

When Chuck Norris calls you, you have two options: either yes, or yes. Choose one if you want to live ...

When Chuck Norris plays a game, every minute is potentially "Sudden Death" for his opponents...including cards and board games.

Ah hem. Im sorry by If Chuck Norris is a zombie, your screwed, i mean, WE'RE ALL SCREWED DAMMIT! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!

If a Domino's driver is late delivering your pizza, the pizza is free of charge. If a Domino's driver is late with Chuck Norris' pizza, that driver immediately loses his life. (And all future pizzas Chuck orders are free of charge)

Chuck Norris has decided the value of Pi shall be 1, henceforth.